Naperville, IL family law attorney Melissa Kuffel discusses what you can do if your ex-boyfriend won’t take responsibility for his child. She explains that in a parentage case where you are the mother, there are important considerations to keep in mind. Initially, when a child is born, the father has no legal rights. This is often unknown to many people. Even if the father signs the birth certificate or a voluntary acknowledgment of paternity (VAP), these actions do not grant him any rights until he goes to court and is formally adjudicated as the father. This means that the mother is not obligated to allow him to see the child or have any contact with him, and she will not receive any child support or assistance from him.

If a mother seeks my advice, I inform her that the decision is ultimately hers to make. If she does not want the father in her life or doesn’t need child support, that is her choice. However, if she requires child support or if the father wants to be involved in the child’s life, we proceed by filing a petition in parentage court. The petition, with a lengthy name, aims to establish the father-child relationship, create a parenting schedule, and determine child support.

To establish paternity, we first examine if there was a voluntary acknowledgment of paternity (VAP). If such a document exists, many courts, depending on the county, will accept it as sufficient evidence. If there is no voluntary acknowledgment of paternity or if the father contests his paternity, a DNA test may be required. Once paternity is established, the father becomes legally obligated to provide child support and contribute to child-related expenses, such as daycare costs.

On the other hand, the father also has the right to request parenting time and decision-making responsibilities. If the parents do not reach an agreement, they are typically sent to mediation, where a neutral third party, such as a trained mediator, attempts to facilitate a resolution without going to court. If mediation fails, the judge appoints a guardian ad litem (GAL) to investigate and determine the best interests of the children.

The conclusion of a parentage case involves entering an allocation judgment, which essentially becomes the parenting plan. This judgment outlines decision-making responsibilities, rights of each parent, and the parenting schedule, including holiday and break arrangements. This allocation judgment represents the culmination of the parentage case and provides a framework for co-parenting moving forward.